Big Game Hunting

I think I mentioned in my first blog that I try to avoid using our blow-darts and have decided to tell the story that will illustrate why.

At one of my clinics in NZ we had a pole syringe which consisted of a needle-tipped syringe attached to a pole. When the needle was briskly inserted into an animal's rump the plunger would depress, injecting the drug into the unsuspecting creature. The key word in that sentence was "briskly". The pole was used mainly on deer, but also proved quite useful for the odd aggressive dog.

Unfortunately my new clinic does not possess such a magical instrument. Instead my boss, using good old Aussie ingenuity (almost as good as Kiwi ingenuity), has fashioned his own blow-dart "pole" out of actual blow-darts and, wait for it, a curtain-rail! And it works! Rather well actually. He's even been driven around a paddock chasing a wild cow and managed to bring her down after five or six attempts. Mostly, however, we use it to dart aggressive dogs once they've been thrown into a cage by their owners (often without warning us beforehand that there would be no way for us to get said animal OUT of the cage again in order to sedate it). It's actually very humane as the animal doesn't realise what's happening until it's already done, and a lot less stressful than dragging an animal out of a cage with a pole catcher or wrestling an angry muzzled dog. He gave me a crash course though I never did get around to practicing with it and of course, the day came when I wished I had.

A grumpy dog was brought in on a Saturday morning and put in the cage before a vet (i.e. me) was available to sedate him. He then proceeded to growl and bare his teeth at anyone passing within 5m of the cage. Which didn't bode well for the poor sucker who had to get him out of the cage. The considerate owner had also removed the dog's lead so we had nothing to grab onto but his collar...which was situated a bit too close to his teeth for my liking. So out came the blow darts. I loaded up a syringe, attached the fluffy orange dart end thingy, took careful aim from about a foot away...and fired. A perfect hit right in the bum! I was doing a silent dance of triumph and feeling like a big game hunter after their first successful shot, when my nurse pointed out that the plunger hadn't actually depressed and now all I had was an angry aggressive dog in a cage with a massive needle and syringe full of drugs impaled in his rear. Not good. I didn't want to compound the situation by trying again and thought with longing of my pole syringe. I grabbed the dog catcher and with shaking hands slowly opened the cage door just wide enough to slip the noose into the cage & over the dog's head. Thankfully he was too concerned with the foreign body in his rump to barge out of the cage as I opened it. I then quietly and CALMLY opened the cage door and allowed him out, waiting for the explosion of twists and turns and head-high leaps that usually occur when a dog gets noosed. He came out quiet as a lamb and allowed the nurse to muzzle him, and then let me inject him the usual way without so much as a wriggle! I apologised to the dog for taking such extreme action, but still left a nice long lead attached to his collar as I put him back in the cage. Just in case.

So that was my one and only attempt to dart an animal so far. When I get the chance I will have to draw a target on a box and practice out the back. Then, when I get really good, I will try to convince my nurse to stand with an apple on her head so that I can become the next William Tell.